Reflecting on Motherhood

When they're babies and you've had countless sleepless nights, you think to yourself "when they're older, it will get easier." Then you blink and they're in school. You volunteer for the PTA and collect box tops, soup can labels and other fundraising points until your head explodes! You volunteer to help work the book fairs, class trips, gift shops, and other special events. You attend all the class plays, music concerts and meet the teacher nights. You go shopping at 10pm for poster board for a project you only found out about at the last minute. Then you blink and they're teenagers. They want to drive, and date and don't want to be seen with you. Their homework is more difficult and you scramble to help them with trigonometry that you haven't done in 20 years! You lose sleep filling out college applications and waiting for responses. Then you blink and they're all grown up. We pour our hearts and souls into our children. Once they move out on their own we reflect back to their childhood and would give anything to just hold that precious little baby once more - lost sleep and all!

online writing

So for a couple of years now, I've been writing articles online in several locations. I've managed this and another blog, and managed a facebook fan page for "lilmrsknowitall"! The money comes in in drips and drabs but hey, it's money! I recently was told by a friend about a new writing site called "List My Five". It's just lists and it hasn't been ranked by Google yet but people are making money! So, I figured I'd give it a try! So far it's slow but of course I have my hopes up!

so far so good..

My girl scout camping trip went extremely well! Everything went as planned and the girls really seemed to enjoy it! They cooked out of their box ovens that we made, started the campfires with firestarters we made out of dryer lint and candle wax! They also took their duties seriously and without complaints, they cleaned the latrines, set up the dunk line, and pitched the tents. Overall, I'm glad that the first time is over-with because I was getting so anxious that my stomach hurt! We're definitely going again in the Spring!
The kids have been in school for over a month already and I just can't keep up with all the activities! I've been using my crockpot to cook dinner almost every day just so that a home-cooked meal is ready and waiting while we're all running around! I am so thankful for that little bit of pre-planning when I get home and am too tired to cook!

girl scouts...

So, I'm taking my scouts camping for the first time! I'm truly excited and nervous at the same time! I took the overnight outdoor training and learned to cook in the coolest ways! We are going to make our own firestarters and box ovens. I think my girls will love the experience and have a great time! I hope all goes according to plan! Please pray for no rain!

jealousy...

Ok so I'm talking with some female coworkers at lunch the other day and we get on the topic of all the actvities our children are involved in. School has just started and already the fall PTA fundraiser has been sent home. Not to mention, girl and boy scouts started, ballet, and after school intramurals. I tell them that I love my slow cooker for for preparing meals in the morning so dinner is done when we get home. Granted I am one of the few part time workers in my office. A comment was made that well at least I have the time in the morning to set up my slow cooker, as they arev schlepping their uncooperating babies around to day care before work starts. Not for nothing, but I work my ass off in the office and at home. My kids come home to me being there, checking homework and involved in ALL their activies! To me, this is just another example of jealousy. I know they are physically in the office 3 more hours per day than I am, but iI will trump them in that I am a dedicated, involved and reliable parent! Don't worry baby, Mommy's here!

Back to school!

I've written some tips on how to get ready for back to school time. http://www.ehow.com/how_4484006_back-school-ready.html It's important that the transition is smooth for the kids AND you! We need to get ourselves organized, start the school year fresh - you know, because we're going to join the PTA this year and actually attend the meetings! lol Seriously, there are many things to get ready. I've got both school supply lists, doctors forms are ready, summer reading is in full swing, and the bed times will be progressively shortened! Yes, moms, it's that time. We look forward to it, and yet we also dread it. It's a brand new school year but our babies are getting older. Many different emotions circling around, but in the end I'm confident that we will all make it through together!

Old Fashioned Backyard Birthday Party

For years, kids birthday parties have been spiraling out of control and beyond the reach of many of our wallets. I, personally, cannot keep up with the Joneses on this one. With spoiled housewives on tv hosting lavish parties for kids, it's hard to sell a simple backyard party to your own child! Or is it?
We recently hosted a simple birthday party for our daughter, where we made our own pinata, played outdoor games and just let the kids be kids! We served pizza and lemonade, then let the kids make their own ice cream sundae with an assortment of toppings! The kids had a great time! We got so many compliments from parents who didn't realize that the simplicity of it all would go over so well! Next time you need to plan a birthday party for your child, maybe you will skip the huge hubbub of a party and think about the simpler and sweeter things!

Summer Zumba - for me!

I just signed up to take a Zumba class that I've been hearing so much about. I know Zumba has been out awhile but I'm just now getting into the loop. My first class was Tuesday and boy was it tiring! I worked my butt off! We had a great time working out and learning crazy dance moves all at the same time! This is how I take my own "time out" and rejuvenate myself. I've taken a belly dancing class with mommy friends before and we had a blast! This time I also have many mommy friends taking it with me plus my sister-in-law is teaching so it's great so far! I really enjoy being out with other moms doing something for myself, having a great time, then coming home to my family ready to face any challenge!

All good...

Kids are with Grandma....and I'm enjoying some free time! It's always important to take a time out as parents to make time for ourselves and relax! The happier we are, the happier we can make our children! So make sure that when you're running around making plans for the kids - you also make some plans for yourself!

Summer activities

At first I thought "Oh no, what am I going to do with the kids all summer long!" As we are in to the third week of summer vacation - I am finding that we CAN'T fit everything in! They've had play dates and sleepovers, days at the pool and rainy days at the movies, birthday parties, days out with grandma, a huge 4th of July party, sports and games, etc.! I'm so tired I can't imagine the rest of the summer going on like this! I think we, as parents, feel we need to occupy every minute of every day for our children. But, what I find works best is to let them explore and make the most of their summer on their own! The bonus is that I get a little vacation too!

nag, nag, nag

I know I've said before - at least a thousand times - but I refuse to do everything myself! This is why I'm the nag, I'm the bitch, I'm the crazy one who can't relax. I'm teaching OUR children to be more responsible, to clean up after themselves, to not want the house to smell like a litter box - not just for guests but for us too! Silly me, I must be asking to much of my family! This is my job after all, isn't it? Ugggh! I'm so sick of it. I don't know how much longer I can put up with it.

The things we do for our children...

On Wednesday I heard that a famous singer was going to be performing in Central Park. I was actually contemplating taking my daughter to camp out the night before for these free-but-limited tickets. Luckily, we were able to snag some ahead of time so I didn't have to go with that crazy idea!
Thursday night the other crazy mom in this story and her daughter and the two of us are making posters and t-shirts for the girls to wear the next morning. We failed at trying to tie-dye them because it turns out you need like 12 hours to do that! So we printed out pictures and ironed them on instead. Lastly we had a great idea of using fabric puffy paint to really make them stand out!
Friday morning we get up at 3:45 am...drive to pick up the other crazy mom and her daughter and drive into the city. It only took 35 minutes to get near the park entrance, but then it took 45 minutes of circling to find a parking spot! We finally found one, ran out of the car with the girls in t-shirts that still hadn't dried, just to go wait on a long line! They were walking like mummies with their arms out but it didn't help! There was puffy paint on their arms, faces, and even some other people in line in front of us! shhh!
The show was awesome, though I've never been so tired in my life - having to hold up my daughter for three hours! The girls really seemed to enjoy it! I don't think they realized how much trouble we went through for them! I know I never realized all the things my parents must have gone through until I became a parent myself!

Bullying...

When I was younger kids got teased, fights happened on the playground but you dusted yourself off and were friends again like nothing happened. Now as a parent it seems like bullying is on the rise and I'm at a loss for what to do about it. My son was the victim of a bully a few years ago. He was pushed, poked and name-called. It hurt me so much to see him hurt. There were many meetings and phone calls with teachers and the principal. Unfortunately nothing really resolved. I constantly told him to push back, figuring the bully would get the idea not to mess with him. I know not everyone agrees with that tactic but I had had enough! Sure enough - my tactic worked! My son felt empowered to stand up for himself and the bully moved on to someone else.
I have no regrets having handled that situation in that way. But now, as a Girl Scout troop leader I am hearing that one of "my" girls is being a bully. I'm not sure what to do. Even though she is not my daughter, I feel obligated to help correct this situation. Whenever we are together as a troop I am very mindful of how the girls treat each other and would never stand for mean words or actions as long as I'm around. But I'm in a little predicament in that the bully AND her victim are my scouts. While the bullying has never happened on my watch, I'm hearing stories from both families of what has happened in school. I feel my loyalty is to both of them and I should be there for them as a listener and a friend. I have to watch what I say and not put myself in the middle.
What would you do? Please comment and let me know!

working inside or outside the home

This is a very controversial subject and hopefully you will all leave wonderful debatable comments!

Working part time gives me the ability to see both sides of the story. Is is better to work outside the home or stay at home with your kids? I'm sorry but I think my life is a very nice balance of both. Staying at home with kids is the absolute HARDEST job of all! There is no way for me to juggle motherhood, be involved in their lives, take care of a household - without working outside the home for even a few hours! It would just drive me crazy! Granted most of the household responsibilities still fall solely on me, but going to work while the kids are in school gives me a sense of importance and freedom. I also appreciate the adult conversations and escape from daily chores.

I am a firm believer in making mom happy first. If you're not happy - then there is no way for you to teach your children self-respect. Treat yourself to a weekly or even daily time slot of mommy time without kids. You'll regain your strength and energy and be able to give more to your family.

What to do with the kids over the summer?

I work part time but the town camp around here is full day 8:30-5:30. I hate to have them in camp all day but I also don't want them to be stuck in the house while I work. Plus paying for full day camp on a part time salary just doesn't cut it! I guess while I'm at work they will just have to use that time to do their summer reading and math worksheets and some chores around the house. The time usually flies by and then we can all enjoy the rest of the day together!

I refuse to do it all by myself...

I did not grow up in the 50's thinking that a woman's job was to stay at home, raise the kids and take care of the hubby. Fortunately my parents raised me to believe that a woman can do anything a man can do - but probably better! We are naturally good at: nurturing, multitasking, fixing, problem-solving, refereeing, etc. We make do with what we have and not only make the best of it - but really make it the best!

I know there are women who want to be the only caregiver for their children. I also know that there are women who have nannies to take care of their children while they are getting pampered. While these are opposite ideas - it's just great that we have the CHOICE in the matter.

I believe that there is no suck thing as a woman's job. We can do all and be all.

Balancing everything

Some days I can't even imagine all the juggling moms have to do. I only have two kids and that's hard enough. I have friends with three and four kids who balance extracurricular activities for all of them! Amazing! Both my kids are involved in a few activities each, and sometimes they're schedules overlap leaving me scrambling to find a carpool or someone to take pictures for me! I've made some great mom friends who share in my struggle and also have kids the same age as mine. It works out great for school functions and childcare. We'll take turns watching each others kids whenever we have a conflict - so the kids get to play and we get to save money on childcare! It's great to have a circle of friends that you can do this with. It not only helps in a jam, but sometimes both families will all get together or we'll even swap kids for an even out with the hubby!

whew, I'm pooped

Had a great weekend with my daughter camping on a girl scout weekend with a sister troop. We hiked, sang songs, did crafts, etc. Brought home 3 bags of trash, 4 loads of laundry, and endless tchotchkes to put away! It was a wonderful time, a beautiful place, and a great group of people! I'm exhausted and my allergies are killing me! But all was well worth it and gave me plenty of ideas to use for our girl scout troop.

What a day...

I personally believe that every day should be Mother's Day! Out of 365, we only get 1 day for you to appreciate everything we do for you? Not fair!

Seriously - love your mom each and every day. Let her know that you appreciate her and everything she does.

Happy Mother's Day to my fellow strong women who are holding down the fort!

A day in the life of this MOM...

I woke up, had coffee (because I would kill if I didn't), checked email, responded to emails, balanced the checkbook, updated my twitter and facebook statuses, put laundry in the washing machine, vacuumed, fed the cats, unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher, wiped down the counters, finished writing mothers day cards, started dinner in the crockpot, emptied and refilled the coffeepot, made breakfast and ate, got dressed and ready, made sure I had everything and locked up the house, went to the library to reserve a book, went to the post office to mail mothers day cards and recital ticket order, went to the dollar store for more seeds for the garden, went to work for 4.5 hours, ran home just in time for the kids to get off the bus, chased them to wash up - then have a snack - then homework, emptied lunchbags, changed into comfy clothes, checked bookbags for notices, wrote out permission slips for field trip and a friend over, made lunches for the next day, wrote two articles for Bukisa, checked phone messages, switched cell phone carriers to cheaper plan, finished making dinner, put laundry in dryer, vacuumed again (we have 3 cats), printed girl scout emails for activities coming up this weekend, checked homework, set the table, ate dinner, cleaned up dinner, loaded the dishwasher, fed the cats, folded the laundry, picked out clothes for tomorrow, played on facebook for a little while, answered over a thousand questions from the kids, got ready for bed, got the kids ready for bed, double checked that everything was ready for tomorrow, checked emails, returned more emails, looked into switching insurance companies, updated my calendar for tomorrow, watched a little tv, settled into bed with my newly borrowed book and drifted off to sleep around 11:30pm .....just to start all over at 6:45am! Sound familiar??? That was an easy day - usually I have some meeting to attend, a child to pick up or drop off, a birthday gift to pick up, or a girl scout activity to attend to.

It's tiring being a mom. Happy Mother's Day to all you wonderfully tired moms out there!! xoxoxo

I'm thinking of blogging "a day in the life of a mom". I just watched a show last night where the husband and wife were having a friendly competition about who does more! This is the most irritating subject! It's so hard to put into words everything we do, everything we're thinking at every given moment and everything we're constantly worrying about! I hope to attempt this sometime next week. Just add it to my list!

Money

Money is the root of many problems for people - I am definitely one of them! My husband and I work very hard but costs just keep rising. Everywhere I turn something else costs more than it did the last time I looked! Fortunately, I am an extremely savvy shopper. I clip coupons, in fact, I play the coupon game each week with groceries. I've gotten pretty good at it, though not as incredible as some other "coupon moms." I'm content with feeding my family of 4 (with everything they ask for) on under $300 per month! We're switching our cell phones to prepaid plans, which will actually give us some more bells and whistles but for less money. My husband just switched our insurance to another carrier also saving us money.
With all that, you'd think money WASN'T the root of our problems - but in fact, it's what is keeping me up at night. I constantly worry about all the what ifs. We still haven't finished building our house and I'm not sure if that will ever happen. I'm hoping for a miracle because I'm getting too old to take so many risks!

I'm amazed

This morning I watched another mom , whom I know is stressed and has plenty on her plate, bend down to fix her son's hair. The touching part of this was that they were laughing and being playful. Every time she tried to fix his hair he would dodge her hand. It was a moment that I said to myself that despite all that we go through and all that is on our minds at any given time - we always try to put on a smile for the benefit of others. Next time you see that mom smiling and laughing, look deep. She may just need a hug.

being supportive

I was in a real predicament this week....I tried to be encouraging and supportive but it turned around to bite me. It really bothers me to think that there are people out there that are so stubborn they'd rather lose friends and family than to admit they were wrong. I know what I know and I ask for what I don't know. We should all think this way. It's ok to be wrong sometimes. It's ok to ask for help. It's ok to be appreciative of assistance. Just remember that burned bridges may never be rebuilt!

well...

It's been awhile. So much has been going on! I see that other moms are going through the same things I am yet somehow I don't feel any better! We have to stick together, we have to let down our guards and accept help! Lean on your friends or your mommy groups because without them - you'd probably cry!